Thanksgiving 2014

Everyone else had other plans for Thanksgiving this year, so we were on our own. We are  happy that Ford and Shiala are living here now, so that they can join us. We just planned the good ol' traditional Thanksgiving meal and it was a wonderful day spent with the people I love most (Only thing that would have made it better would be to have had Jordan and Lindsey here.) 

This is the little kid's table this year… only my 3 little boys
I found some printable placemats with activities on them…that helped pass the time for them.

The big people's table...

The PIES!!
Shiala helped make pies. She loves to bake and we are glad!

Sweet little Kami! So fun to have her close so we can see her and she can get to know us better.

Shiala and Ford - they're so cute. Love them.

Playing a little Canasta after dinner…teaching Shiala the Welch Family Favorite Card Game! HaHa! We sure don't play it as often as we used to...

We have so much to be grateful for. If I tried to write everything down, my poor fingers would likely fall off. I am so thankful to my Heavenly Father for all his tender mercies and care of our family. He has ALWAYS taken care of us, in good times and not so good times. He is always faithful and anxious to bless His children. Any good thing that I have in my life is a direct result of His love and generosity. His greatest blessing to us all is the gift of His Only Begotten Son, Jesus Christ. The Plan of Salvation and Christ's gift is the ultimate expression of God's love for His Children.

What would a holy woman do?

I have been a reader of Shannon's blog for a long time. She has some amazing helps for studying scriptures and teaching. I read this post at the beginning of this year and decided to also read the book she spoke of and focus on becoming a more holy woman this year. I printed off her posters and placed them around my home in places where I would see them often.

At first, I really did think about how I was doing things as I went through my day. Was I mothering in a more holy way? Was I serving my family with holy intentions rather than grudgingly, out of duty? Was I serving in my calling in a more holy way? Was I being a better daughter, sister, friend, wife, neighbor?

However, I noticed as the year went on and I became accustomed to the signs, I noticed them less. They became part of the 'landscape' and as I noticed them less, I put less thought into my actions. I think the one that helped me the most was having a picture of this as the screensaver on my phone. I saw it every time I looked at my phone. I should probably put it back. 

I am thankful for the introspection and intentionality I had at the beginning of the year and I think it's been a very worthwhile experiment. I need to try to continue it because after all, what do I want more than to be like my Savior and my Heavenly Father? I want to rejoin them more than anything. I need to think daily about how my actions reflect that desire and make necessary changes to realign myself with that goal. 

None of us will be perfected in this life, but we must work towards that all our days. Learning to think outside ourselves (our carnal, selfish selves) and to have His will be our will is what we are here to work on. It's a lifelong process, and I'm thankful I have a lifetime to work on getting to that point. 

The Jordan Welch Family

I adore this picture. I love this little family. So fun to watch our family grow!

Awww….

I'm so wishy-washy...

Lately I've been really disenchanted with my 'farm chores'. This will be the second winter of caring for chickens and I find myself dreading going out into the cold to take care of them. So each day it seems to be later in the day before I get out there. I mentioned to Curtis how tired I was of the chore and he said that, if I want to, we can give them all to our farmer friend and just buy the eggs from him....I'm thinking I like the sound of that.

When we moved here 5 years ago I was so excited and gung-ho to have the space to build a mini-farm. I wanted chickens, possibly goats or a milk cow, and a LARGE garden. It took us a while to get our feet under us and start collecting. We built garden boxes, we got more bees, we got the chickens and came thisclose to getting milking goats. In the last three years, this is what I've learned:

• I'm not a gardener. I like growing food, but I'm not Mavis and I'm not going to grow tons of food because I don't like being outside working in the garden all day!
• I'm not my dad. I don't like having daily feeding chores. Last winter I kept asking myself why I had turned myself into my dad. I had animals that I HAD to feed every day... rain, snow or shine.
• I'm SSSOOOOOOOO glad I never got a goat or cow to milk! If I think feeding chickens, collecting eggs and cleaning a coop is bad...! Yikes. 
• I thought the kids would be more involved in all this, but that was my dream, not theirs, hence the fact that C and I are the ones doing all the work....
• Although I'm thankful to have tried these things and for what I've learned (about chickens and gardening) through this experience, it's not my love and passion. I don't dream about it...anymore. 

My friend and I were discussing this the other day, (she still loves this stuff) and she asked me what my passion was. What do I love to do and long to do? And I had to say, "I don't know." I truly don't. I wonder if I'll every figure it out, or if I'll just go through life, trying this or that or whatever is sounding good at the moment only to realized it's not IT either.

I have heard of mothers who feel like they've lost themselves in the process of mothering and I've never quite related to that. But now, after 25+ years of being a mom I'm realizing I'm not sure who I am or what I am beyond a mom. I'm not angry or resentful about it, mostly I'm confused and curious. What lies within me waiting to be discovered?

I recently read a blog post, (can't find the link or I'd post it) and it talked about how people have either a 'fixed' mindset or a 'growth' mindset. It was very interesting and has given me a lot to think about. I've realized that logically I say I have or believe in a 'growth' mindset but my behavior and history tell me I've lived a 'fixed' mindset. I want to change that. I want to stop being afraid to try new things or to learn. I have a number of things I've wanted to do/learn but as I have grown older when I think of them, I usually think to myself that "it's too late, the time for such things is past". I think it's more that I'm letting fear of failure stop me from attempting things. I've always said it's never too late to learn or that learning never stops, yet I stop my learning at the doing stage. I study, research and digest information and then never DO anything with it other than think about it.

I'm hoping that in my wishy-washy way I can find what my passion is, or at least find something I truly enjoy doing, and actually make myself DO IT!

Halloween 2014

Halloween was a simple affair this year. Since the school has stopped having a carnival on Halloween day, it surely eases up the schedule on that day. We had planned to go to the Harvest Festival on the Saturday before Halloween that is sponsored by the school and the city, but when it came down to it the kids didn't really want to go and I wasn't about to force them to go. We all know how much I "love" Halloween anyway. We then decided to have our own little carnival here and had plans to do it on Halloween afternoon after school. But then a football game was scheduled for that afternoon and it preempted our carnival. Oh, well. Best laid plans of mice and men.....

We did do our traditional little jack-o-lantern pizzas and then dressed the boys up and sent them out around the neighborhood with Montana. They each got a little load of candy in their buckets and it was enough to tide them over while we watched 'The Ghost and Mr. Chicken" to end the evening.

Fix It Felix aka James

I splurged a little bit this year and let the two older boys get store bought costumes from the thrift store. They were both new and can be used year-round since they are not Halloween specific costumes. Sadie helped James with his costume and I think it turned out super cute.

Darth Vader aka Charles

Power Ranger aka Soren

Ready to go trick-or-treating

making little Jack 0 Lantern pizzas...

Soren must be related to his Grandpa Barton...

Hannah had to cheer at the quarterfinal football game and they all dressed up as zombie cheerleaders...

Good Things:

Helpful older sisters and brothers who lighten mom and dad's load...

It was not too cold this year...no snow

We don't get many trick-or-treaters since we live on the edge of town, so we don't have to buy a ton of candy....

'School' for James

I decided to do a little preschool with James this year since he and I would have one-on-one time in the afternoons. I found a fun little curriculum at Brightly Beaming. It focuses on learning the letters, shapes, colors, numbers, etc. Sometimes it's been hit and miss, like when apple-processing took over my life, but we have had fun with it. James really likes the number learning because he gets to stick the correct number of stickers on the number pages and he likes the number matching game I made for him. He is doing well with learning the names of the letters and how to write them. He is particularly fond of A and H. Down, down, over! He has gone from demanding that I color his letters and pictures to happily doing his own.

I love this little guy and his quick mind. I have to persuade him to participate at times, but when he finally does, we always have a good time together.....

learning about 'squares' by making square cookies

practicing writing B in rice

we have a little poster that we put all the week's information on as we learn about it. 

James was standing on a stool with a flashlight, turning around to be a 'lighthouse' (not very happily)

learning about stars...did you know there's a star in every apple?...

Good Things:

people willing to share their ideas and hard work 

solo time with James

Nashville Tribute Band

I don't know how it came about but the Nashville Tribute Band did a concert in our little town in our stake center last night. It was awesome. All the songs were sung from the point of view of someone who knew or interacted with Christ. I loved the music and the messages of the songs. I need to purchase this album as well as the others they have done.
It's nice to know that there are some good, strong, LDS people in the music industry who are not ashamed of their faith and are willing to share it openly.

crappy picture but it proves they were here!

Helping at the kindergarten Halloween party

I got the opportunity to help in Charles' classroom with the Halloween Party. He was very excited to have me there. There were several stations set up for the kids to rotate through. I was in charge of the decorate a cupcake/make an oreo spider station.  There was also a candy corn bingo station and a wrap a mummy station. Lots of goodies to be had as well.

Charlie playing candy corn bingo

I really enjoyed the chance to see him in his classroom and to watch him interact with his classmates and teacher. He's quiet as he goes about his business but I could tell he was comfortable and happy to be there. He LOVES school!

Learning to feel comfortable being me

I have always struggled with me. I have had a hard time liking myself and who I am and the way I am. I have always hated pictures of myself and usually avoid being in them if possible. After reading some articles/blog posts about being in the pictures anyway, I decided that I need to just quit worrying about what I look like and whether I like how I look in the pictures and just be in them. I don't think my kids will be worried about how I looked. Hopefully they'll just be happy I'm in them at all.
I am also learning to love myself for who I am. DYT has helped me realize that I am not a mistake or flawed. I am not like my mom in lots of ways but that's ok. It's ok if I do things slower cause I get caught in the details and 'what ifs'. I have learned that some of the things I thought were weaknesses are actually my gifts to the world.
I have learned that Heavenly Father has made me the way I am and that as His child I have value and worth. Maybe some of that acceptance comes from age as well. I find as I get older I care less what anyone else thinks about me. That's a nice place to be...to finally feel comfortable being me!

probably my favorite picture of myself. I didn't smile big enough to squish my eyes shut! LOL

We were taking pictures for a DYT contest of a mom and daughter dressing their truths.

She's much more comfortable in front of a camera than I am...

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Trying to make beach waves in my hair with salt spray...

Not too wavy, but I kind of liked it...

Not bad for a girl with stick-straight hair...

This was a really GOOD hair day...

Used a flat iron to make these soft curls. Oh, the irony. Using a flat iron to add curls to naturally straight hair.

I felt really pretty this day...

Not afraid to be in pictures anymore. If I wait until I think I look good enough for pictures there will never  be any of me in them for my kids to see...

Holding Kami on her blessing day. So fun to be a grandma!

Lawn remodel

Last summer we decided that we wanted to remove the evergreen hedge that separated the upper and lower west lawns. With it there we never used the lower lawn, it just was out of sight, out of mind.  We wanted to move the trampoline to that lower west lawn and thought that it would be nice if the whole lawn was opened up for use. So we had Jim come up with the tractor and pull all the evergreens out except for the end one by the steps on the south side. Then we left it alone for the winter.
This year we dug out weeds and Curtis rototilled it to remove rocks and roots. We raked it and smoothed it, and spread new grass seed and then used my dad's old metal lawn-roller to press the seed into the soil.
The trick was to keep the soil moist while the seed germinated. That took a few weeks but by the end of summer we had a nice, gently sloping lawn that saw plenty of use this summer. It will continue to fill in in the coming years and someday no one will know there was ever a huge hedge there.

roots and rocks dug out and raked, smoothed and flattened

we removed the rock steps at the north end of the yard

Lawn now (Oct 2014)

Idaho-Emerson's blessing

Jordan and Lindsey were blessing Emerson last weekend so Curtis, Mom and I drove up to be there. We really wanted to take all the kids, but really could not afford to. Taking the Suburban is just so costly and then we would have had to have several nights at a hotel. We told the kids that we were planning to give them a trip to Idaho for Christmas to be taken in the late spring or summer next year. So they decided that they'd rather go when there was more time to do something and when Emerson was bigger and could play with them.
I love the drive to Rexburg. Curtis had not been there before and he really loved it too. We only wish it wasn't so far away and we could see them more often, (or that we lived in Idaho!). We had a nice dinner on Saturday night to celebrate Curtis's, Lindsey's dad's and my birthdays. On Sunday we went to Sacrament Meeting with Jordan and Lindsey to be part of this special event.
Emerson was one of three babies being blessed that day. Lots of babies in a student ward, but no other kids. Curtis has always disliked young married student wards. I always feel like we missed out a little in forming friendships with people in the same stage of life by not being in one when we first married. I have seen other people who made lifelong friends in those student wards. Hope Jordan and Lindsey are having a good experience in theirs.
It was much too quick trip for me. I wanted to spend more time with him. He is a sweet little! boy. It sure is fun to watch my son be a father and take such good care of his family. Life is good!

Great-Grandma and Emerson

Such a sweet little face.

4 generation photo op!
Great-grandma Barton. Grandma Welch, Jordan and Emerson Welch

So thankful we were able to be there for this special day! I love watching our family grow :)

About Charles

Charles has really blossomed this year. He loves school and loves to learn to read and write. This picture is of a whiteboard he was practicing his writing on. He decided he needed to write all the names of the people in his family and make a stick person to go with.

He is really growing too. He is no longer a chunky toddler, but a thin, tall boy instead. He also has a bit of a silly side to him. I have no idea why he was wearing his sisters' headband in this picture but it shows his silly side. If you look carefully you can see his little dimple on his cheek which shows up when he is trying really hard not to smile. We are thankful for this sensitive, silly guy. He is such an important part of our family.

Procrastination is not my friend...

'Procrastination is not your friend!' is one of Curtis's favorite sayings. We hear it a lot at our house.

Lately I've come to realize what my own procrastination has cost me.

At least twice in the last couple of months I have found myself missing out on serving someone or doing something I'd really wanted to do because I had put off doing something else and the time was gone. 

At the end of Aug I had a talk to give in church. I knew about it for 3 weeks but kept putting off putting anything down on paper. The last couple of days I knew I had to focus and write. An opportunity (can't for the life of me remember now exactly what. *Curtis helped me remember that we were given the opportunity to help clean the temple after the last Saturday session but I couldn't stay.*)came up on one of those days and I had to decline because I had left myself no time. 

This week I was invited to go to the temple with my sister while she was in town. I told her I'd love to go and that I better get my robe ironed. I'd washed it weeks ago and let it sit in a basket to be ironed. Well, come Saturday afternoon and I'm scrambling to get ready and realize my robe is still not ironed. I ran downstairs, turned on the iron and tried to put those pleats back into it. I got the iron too hot and nearly ruined my robe. I then realized I didn't have time to get it done before I'd need to leave and with a heavy heart I had to let my sister know I would not be able to be there.

In both of these instances, if I had not put off the task I would have been able to serve when the opportunity arose. I feel badly that because I didn't get to the temple maybe one person had to wait for her ordinance work to be done a little bit longer. 

I have fought procrastination all my life, along with its companion, perfectionism. I hate to think of all I've missed out on or caused others to miss out on because of it. I hope that I can do a better job in the future, remembering these lessons and that when those service opportunities arise, I can say, 'Sure, I'd love to help!' knowing I have the ability and availability to do so :)

Favorite picture of Emerson!

Oh my word! So cute!!

Not a lot of extra chub on this guy but he sure is a cute little man! I can't wait to see him in person!

You Look Like My Grandma!'

My dad's aunt passed away recently. I went with my mom to her funeral. In a small town there's always a good turnout at funerals, since everyone knows everyone. We waited in the long line to pay our respects to her children, hugging and visiting with relatives along the way. As I approached her daughter (who was my Beehive advisor eons ago) she looked at me and said, 'Oh, you're so beautiful!' I stammered 'thank you' to her and then she said, 'You look like my grandma!' and gave me a big hug. I smiled and with tears in my eyes, said, 'I do, don't I?'

I've long known that I got my broad cheekbones and apple-y cheeks from my dad's side of the family. My mom said it came through the Mackelprang/Jones/Barton line. But I've never had anyone else notice. Especially someone who actually knew my Great-Grandma Ella. She died when I was 3 months old, so I've only ever seen her in pictures. 

It meant so much to me to hear those words. Oh, how I love my ancestors! Family history and connections between generations are so important to me. I love that I have Grandma Mary's and Grandma Ella's cheekbones! I love that there is something that connects me to them. I can't wait to know them again! I feel blessed to be part of their family!

                                         

 Ella as a young woman. I can see that her nose is slightly upturned like mine, and she has blended cheeks with a softer jawline. Like I do.

Ella later in her life. I see the same cheeks and deep crevices between cheek and mouth area.

Below is Grandma Mary, Ella's mother.