Ponderize January 2016

My ponderizing has gotten way off track since Christmas. I kept this scripture up on the fridge for a whole month. I started a new part time job in Jan which kind of threw me for a loop and it seems my brain was also preoccupied with Montana's upcoming wedding. I was going to replace it (the scripture, not my brain, although that might have been a good idea!) at one point but then realized that I would be studying that chapter in my Book of Mormon study I'm doing so I kept it up. 

I love the second chapter of 2nd Nephi! I love the truth in this verse. I think it's a truth the world has completely lost. Not that it was ever generally understood, but it seems as if everyone in the society I currently live in wants to be FREE. Which, to them, means free to do any thing, give in to any whim or thought or desire and also be free from the responsibility and consequences of their 'free' choices. They don't understand that exercising their agency in that manner will ultimately leave them in bondage and under the power of Satan. And they complain bitterly about how crappy their lives are and how there can be no God because of all the crap in their lives.  

If only freedom and liberty were concepts and principles understood and lived correctly, what a world it would be. We are free. God has given us agency and will not force our obedience. He also will not reward us for evil or bad choices. We will repent or we will pay the price for them ourselves. Is it not easier to just choose the Lord's way? Easier said than done, I know. That darn human factor makes it so much harder than it sounds. Thank heavens (literally!) for the Atonement of Jesus Christ and repentance.  

When I see the ultimate choice here in black and white, (or orange and green!) it's a no-brainer. Why would we deliberately choose to be in captivity and be miserable? (Shrug!) I surely don't know why anyone would CHOOSE that.

Ponderize Jan 1-9 1Nephi 18:3

This week I have been ponderizing a scripture I found as I studied. I have read it countless times before but it never grabbed me the way it did this time. 

It is Nephi speaking of when he was building the ship. He often went up into the mountain to pray and get further instructions and guidance. The Lord gave him what he needed to continue to construct the ship, not after the manner of men, but after the manner God showed him. 

It hit me that I can apply this to my life. By considering the mount to be the temple. I need to go there OFT. It's so silly how hard it is for me to get there regularly. It's 5 minutes away! But if I make an effort to go there and pray OFT there, the Lord will provide the instruction and guidance (show unto me great things) I need to construct my ship. My life. My family. Not after the manner of man, but after the manner shown me by the Lord. 

In some areas of my life it's apparent I haven't patterned my family after the manner of men. 9 kids is definitely not the manner of men. But that's not the only area I want to pattern after the Lord's pattern. I desire to follow Him in all areas, yet my human-ness makes that so much harder than it should be. Kind of like how hard it is to go 5 minutes to the temple. Sounds easy, but is not. 

I really liked the thoughts this scripture gave me and as it's a new year and I'm thinking of ways to improve it has been instrumental. My word for the year came to me early one morning when I woke up before my normal waking time and I was lying in bed, thinking. It's CONSISTENT. I need to be consistent/constant in so many ways. And making a consistent effort to 'go into the mount (temple) oft and pray oft' is one way I can improve this year. 

Ponderize Nov 22-Dec 13

Psalms 27:1

The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? the Lord is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?

I'm afraid my ponderizing has gotten derailed a bit in the last couple of weeks. I think I've had this scripture on my fridge for three weeks. It's short and not very complicated so I haven't focused on memorizing it because it seems easy...

I do love this scripture and it ties in so nicely with my favorite hymn, The Lord is my Light. That hymn has been my favorite from my teen years. I think at first the lovely chorus is what drew me to the song. I love singing it. But over the years I have come to love the words as well. 

I realized a few years ago that "Light" seemed to be my thing. I looked at my house and noticed how many of my decorations were actually means of light...candles, lanterns, pictures of Christ. I even wanted to name James, Lucy, had he been a girl, and Lucy means light. I also at one point, when homeschooling my kids, was trying to figure out what my 'mission' was. What was I here to do, particular to me? I had a dream in which I was told to 'teach them about the light!' As a mother, church teacher, neighbor, I believe I need to share Christ's light, formally or informally. 

There have been a number of talks recently about the subject of light. There are lots of aspects of light but I've been thinking about light and salvation, as referenced in the scripture I've been pondering. I've never liked the dark. I always feel uneasy in the dark. And I'm amazed at how little light it takes to push back the dark. Darkness CANNOT defeat light. Light always wins, even if it's only a little light. Christ is the Light. He will conquer the darkness. The darkness cannot win. As I choose to follow and share his light, darkness is driven away from me and I can bask in the warmth and peace of His light. Because of Him and his gift of the atonement and salvation I do not need to fear the darkness. If I choose light, I choose the winning team. I do not need to be afraid of anyone or anything with Him as my light. 

Ponderize Oct 25-31

Alma 7:23

23 And now I would that ye should be humble, and be submissive and gentle; easy to be entreated; full of patience and long-suffering; being temperate in all things; being diligent in keeping the commandments of God at all times; asking for whatsoever things ye stand in need, both spiritual and temporal; always returning thanks unto God for whatsoever things ye do receive.

I've been pondering this scripture the last couple of weeks. It was the theme of 2 talks in a recent Sacrament Meeting. I've marked it in my scriptures before. To me, it always seemed to be the mantra I needed to repeat/remember as a parent. I've been thinking of the phrase, 'easy to be entreated' and thinking how I'm doing in that regard as a parent. Am I easily entreated? By the Spirit? By my children? By my husband? I feel as if, lately, I've been less approachable. Too wrapped up in my own thoughts, wants, needs. I need to step back, let go and be more available.
I found this quote by Elder Neal A. Maxwell, Oct 1990

"The man and woman of Christ are easily entreated, but the selfish person is not. Christ never brushed aside those in need because he had bigger things to do."

That's rather indicting. I have been much too selfish and brushed others aside much too often.

Here's another quote I found in a small book of quotes on motherhood. It's by Orson Pratt.

"Do not find fault with every trifling error that you may see, for this will discourage your family, and they will begin to think that it is impossible to please you, and after a while, they will be come indifferent as to whether they please you or not. How unhappy and extremely wretched is that family where nothing pleases, where scolding has become almost as natural as breathing." 

It made me wonder if my children's inability to 'hear me and be obedient' is due to this reason. I don't want to be a nag. I don't like to be an irritant. But I also hate to be ignored. I might ought to try a new tactic. I have often tried new tactics, it's the consistency I stink at. That's why it's usually back to the default nagging.

Another part of this scripture I pondered and studied was being submissive or willing to submit. I found a talk by Elder Neal A Maxwell from the May 1985 Ensign that was so full of good stuff. It is titled "Willing to Submit". Here are some quotes I liked:

"Moreoever, the descriptive simplicity of this quality (submissiveness) is matched by its developmental difficulty. It is so easy to be half-hearted, but this only produces half the growth, half the blessings, and just half a life, really, with more bud than blossom. A superficial view of this life, therefore, will not do, lest we mistakenly speak of this mortal experience as coming here to get a body, as if we were merely picking up a suit at the cleaners. Or, lest we casually recite how we have come here to be proved, as if a few brisk push-ups and deep knee bends would do." 

"Required, in particular, is meekness of mind which recognizes God's perfect love of us and His omniscience. By acknowledging these reassuring realities and accepting that God desires our full development and true happiness, we are readied even as the learning experiences come…"

"Spiritual submissiveness means, instead, community and communion as the mind and the heart become settled. We then spend much less time deciding, and much more time serving; otherwise, the more hesitation, the less inspiration. Yielding one's heart to God signals the last stage in our spiritual development. Only then are we beginning to be fully   useful to God! How can we sincerely pray to be an instrument in His hands if the instrument seeks to do the instructing?"

I think in some areas I've been able to submit my will, but not in all. I realize that to have the full growth Elder Maxwell speaks of, I HAVE to be able to fully submit my will. That's scary! What will be required? MORE? Surely as he knows he can depend on us, the things requested increase…. Human-ness is hard.

I also loved in this talk how Elder Maxwell pointed out how Christ knew intellectually that what He came to do would be hard, but that He didn't know how hard, the extremity of it, until He experienced it. Yet He still submitted.

Back in 2001 or 2002 I had a small time of depression and one day literally 'ran away' from home for a time. I ran to the school and sat under a tree and cried. I was so overwhelmed at my life at the time. My friend, Anine, saw me and came to check on me. We talked and I shared my struggles. She said she thought we "had been shown in the premortal life what we would experience here and that we thought we could do it and were excited for the chance." I told her that made me feel worse,  as I seemed to be failing so miserably. We talked some more and I eventually went home to my kids.

Over the years I've thought of this. That we probably did know intellectually what our lives would include, but, like Christ, we just didn't understand how hard being human was going to be.
Can I continue to learn how to submit my will FULLY? Like He did? Can I let go of that false feeling of control? Can I trust the Lord to know best what my potential is? 

Ponderize Oct 18-24 Alma 13:12

12. Now they, after being sanctified by the Holy Ghost, having their garments made white, being pure and spotless before God, could not look upon sin save it were with abhorrence; and there were may, exceedingly great may, who were made pure and entered into the rest of the Lord their God.

After a High Councilman spoke in church today, I decided I needed to further ponder the topic he spoke about and find a scripture to correlate. Bro. Keyes shared the story of Christ telling Nicodemus that "except a man be born again he cannot see the kingdom of heaven." John 3:3
He shared that many people in the world experience this change to become a disciple or follower of Christ and can "see" his kingdom, desire to be there and strive for it.
Christ then says, "Except a man be born of water & of the Spirit he cannot enter into the kingdom of heaven." John 3:5
The properly authorized priesthood covenant and ordinance of baptism & reception of the Holy Ghost is the key to the entrance of the Kingdom of Heaven. We must be baptized and given the 'gift' of the Holy Ghost to be able to 'enter' into the Kingdom of Heaven, not just 'see' it.
This was a very thought provoking idea for me. I had not seen these scriptures in this way before. So I began to study about what being born of the Spirit consisted of and why it's so important.

Here is a quote from Elder Bednar that I loved…

"We are commanded and instructed to so live that our fallen nature is changed through the sanctifying power of the Holy Ghost. President Marion G. Romney taught that baptism of fire by the Holy Ghost "converts [us] from carnality to spirituality. It cleanses, heals, and purifies the soul….Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, repentance and water baptism are all preliminary and prerequisite to it, but [the baptism of fire] is the consummation. To receive [this baptism of fire] is to have one's garments washed in the atoning blood of Jesus Christ."           Romney 1977-quoted by David A Bednar Oct 2007

This talk by Elder Bednar is a fabulous talk to study. It's on my to-do list!

Another quote I found in the Doctrines of the Gospel Student Manual:

"To be 'born again' is to be quickened by the Spirit and receive a change of heart.."

• it begins at baptism and is complete when we receive the companionship of the Holy Ghost
• it is a continual process 

It seems that we usually think of sanctification in tandem with justification. That is a term I have not fully understood. So I also did some reading up on it.
Some quotes/ideas from the Doctrines of the Gospel Student Manual:

"Justification is being forgiven by the Lord and set upon the path of righteousness."

• being born again justifies us - puts us on path to sanctification
• comes through faith in Christ and individual righteousness
• all pertinent ordinances must be entered into in righteousness & be justified and sealed by Holy Spirit of Promise.  

To help me understand justification a bit better I like to think of it like this: It's like being 'in line' with God's laws (which constitute justice) and His will. Like words on a page are left, center or right justified and are lined up a certain way, Justification puts us 'in line' and on the path to sanctification.

Sanctification is defined as : 'a state of saintliness and purity'-Doctrines of the Gospel Student manual

• we are commanded to become sanctified (D&C 43;9,11,16; 88:68; 133:4; 39;18
• is to become holy and without sin
• to obtain eternal life in the presence of God, one must be sanctified
• attainable because of the Atonement, ONLY IF we OBEY His commandments
• Comes by the power of the Holy Ghost. (Alma 13:12, 3 Nephi 27:20, 1 Peter 1:2)

Another quote I liked:

"Sanctification is the work of the Holy Spirit, by which he who is justified is enabled to keep the commandments of God and grow in holiness."      Hyrum M. Smith, Janne M. Sjodahl, Doctrine and Covenants Commentary 1975-quoted by Elder Loren C. Dunn in June 1995 Ensign

So from all this I gathered that we must be 'born again' and become justified or set on the correct path. As we obey and live righteously we become sanctified through the companionship and guidance of the Holy Ghost(born of the Spirit, by fire), and we, through a continual process, become pure and clean and holy.
To be truly converted I have to experience that change in my heart…a mighty change that creates in me an abhorrence of sin, no more disposition to do evil.
Where am I today?…
What is my disposition to do evil?…
Do I abhor sin?….
Baptism by fire(Spirit) is more than just a cleansing by the Holy Spirit. It is a change, the making of a new person, an impetus to ACT, to convert or change… from carnal to spiritual.

I'm sure this is just scratching the surface, but isn't it fabulous that we can continue to learn and gain new insight, wisdom and understanding?

Ponderize (Oct 11-17) 2 Nephi 1:15

15: But behold, the Lord hath redeemed my soul from hell; I have beheld his glory, and I am encircled about eternally in the arms of his love.

Following General Conference and hearing the challenge from Elder Devin Durrant of the 70 to 'ponderize' a scripture a week, I decided to jump on the bandwagon. I found a Facebook group where we can share our scripture each week as well as tips to help with pondering and memorizing.

I also decided to write a post each Sunday about the previous week's scripture and what I learned through my study and pondering. It will be a good record for myself as well as my descendants. 

I decided to start with my favorite scripture. It has long been a favorite. I had a print of this painting because I loved it...

And when I came across this scripture it just tugged at me, and made me think of the painting. I so look forward to finding myself in this place some day in the future. I long to feel His arms around me and to hear, "Well done, though good and faithful servant." 

Over the last few months or year, I have gained a greater understanding of the incredible perfectness of the Plan of Salvation. I used to wonder why God put us here and allowed us to make so many mistakes. I have to admit that at times I wondered why Satan's plan was not the chosen plan. To have us all 'saved', with no baggage, sounded pretty good to me. But I can now see the perfect arrangement of all the elements of the Plan of Salvation. For God to accomplish his work (Moses 1:39) it has to be EXACTLY the way that it is. No other way would work. No other plan could come close. Because of this clarity I have been able to gain, I now view the Atonement with greater appreciation and awe. Jesus truly has redeemed me from hell, one of my own making. He has made it possible for me to have this time of testing and refining and learning from the mistakes I make, to every day be a little more like Him, and to be able to stand before the judgement bar and be found spotless, IF... I will honor the covenants I made to take His name upon me, keep his commandments and always remember Him. He will cover me with his mercy and his grace and be my advocate with the Father. What a gift! 

When we understand how and why 

this plan was conceived and enacted we can truly see how much the Father loves his children and has provided every resource to give them every possible chance to return to Him. If they do not, it's because they will have chosen not to. He will not force us, but every opportunity and His endless mercy invite us to choose to. It's a choice we make repeatedly. Over and over. Every day. Every hour. Every minute. Every choice. Come unto me.