What would a holy woman do?

I have been a reader of Shannon's blog for a long time. She has some amazing helps for studying scriptures and teaching. I read this post at the beginning of this year and decided to also read the book she spoke of and focus on becoming a more holy woman this year. I printed off her posters and placed them around my home in places where I would see them often.

At first, I really did think about how I was doing things as I went through my day. Was I mothering in a more holy way? Was I serving my family with holy intentions rather than grudgingly, out of duty? Was I serving in my calling in a more holy way? Was I being a better daughter, sister, friend, wife, neighbor?

However, I noticed as the year went on and I became accustomed to the signs, I noticed them less. They became part of the 'landscape' and as I noticed them less, I put less thought into my actions. I think the one that helped me the most was having a picture of this as the screensaver on my phone. I saw it every time I looked at my phone. I should probably put it back. 

I am thankful for the introspection and intentionality I had at the beginning of the year and I think it's been a very worthwhile experiment. I need to try to continue it because after all, what do I want more than to be like my Savior and my Heavenly Father? I want to rejoin them more than anything. I need to think daily about how my actions reflect that desire and make necessary changes to realign myself with that goal. 

None of us will be perfected in this life, but we must work towards that all our days. Learning to think outside ourselves (our carnal, selfish selves) and to have His will be our will is what we are here to work on. It's a lifelong process, and I'm thankful I have a lifetime to work on getting to that point. 

An Opportunity...

On Monday I received an interesting phone call.

I was offered a job at the dental office. 

I thought they were calling about my upcoming appointment so when she said 'Would you like to work at the dentist's office?' I was unprepared to hear that. I said, 'What?'

After one short semester at BYU I decided what I really wanted to do was be a dental assistant. I remember as a child using my mom's tiniest crochet hooks to play dentist with my sisters and friends. I think it's something I've always liked and been interested in. I suspect it's because I spent quite a bit of time in the dentist's chair!

So I left BYU and enrolled in a dental assisting school. And I loved it. I worked as a dental assistant, full and then part time, for about 8 years, until Ford was born. At that point I had too much to do at home and Curtis and I decided it was time for me to focus on raising our children. 

I think I always thought that someday I might choose to go back, after the kids were in school or whatever. But the kids kept coming and it's now been 20 years since I last worked in a dental office.
When we first moved here and Curtis only had a part time job I toyed with the idea of going to their office to see if they had any part-time openings. Then I found I was pregnant with James and Curtis got a full-time job so that idea was put on the back burner.

A few months ago I again toyed with the idea but decided to focus on offering pedicures instead. So that's what I've been working toward. So the phone call hit me from out of the blue.

I wanted to say yes. I thought back to my working days and how much I liked dentistry. It hit me that that was one of the only times I've felt confident in myself and in my skills. I have learned to feel confident in my mothering and am so thankful that I find fulfillment and satisfaction in what I do at home, but in most other areas of life I feel like a little kid still and feel completely inadequate.

I told them I appreciated their thinking of me and that in three years I would love the opportunity to work in their office, but that for now, I still need to be home with my little boys. In three years they will all be in school during the day and at that point I can contemplate whether I want to pursue returning to dentistry or not. They told me they would keep my name on their list if other openings come up in the next few years. She said there are changes there quite often.

It was bittersweet. I felt happy to have been considered. And I felt sad that I had to say, "Not now." But I am thankful for the last 20 years that have taught me the importance of a mother being in the home with the children, especially when they are small. No one cares for my kids as much as I do and no one has the responsibility to raise them except Curtis and I. We have made a lot of sacrifices over the years for me to stay home. But we have never regretted that choice. When I contemplate looking back over my life at the end of it, I know I will have no regrets about staying at home with my kids. I will not be sad that I didn't spend more time working out of the home. I will be grateful for the time I had with my kids and the memories we created. I hope they will be thankful for that as well.

I hope that the opportunity for a part-time position comes knocking again. In about 3 years.

Update: I learned yesterday(2/9/14) that my good friend, Elizabeth, was hired for the job. She will be wonderful and I feel like it will be a real blessing for them. Hope I get to work with her someday. 

Tsunami in Provo?

We went to Utah Valley on Saturday for Taylor's mission farewell. We weren't able to leave til Sat morning because of XC and football and cheer/drill on Friday. We had plans to leave early on Saturday. Haha! We all overslept and still had to pack once we woke up. So we left a couple of hours later than we had wanted to. Then we got just past the airport and Cambria realized she had forgotten the guitar and banjo. She wanted to try to trade them for a better guitar. So we turned around and went back for them, also changing drivers. This time we got almost to the Rodeway Inn before I realized that the contact in my left eye was really irritating my eyelid. I noticed a small tear in it that morning and thought it would be okay, after all it was only a week old. But the thought of driving 4+ hours with it hurting didn't make me happy, so we turned around yet again so I could go exchange it for a new one. (when I pulled it out I could see that the tear was nearly to the center of the contact. No wonder it hurt.)

So third time was the charm and we were actually able to get past Peter's Hill this time. We noticed in Spanish Fork Canyon that there had been some flooding, with dried mud on the road. All the hillsides between Skyview and Billy's Mt. had deep crevices on them where the water had run off them, with piles of sand, rock and debris at the base of the hills. We could also see that we were driving into a storm. We even saw a bolt of lightening hit. When we were going up the east side of Billy's Mt. I was looking up at the switchbacks from when they had made the cut there in 83-84 to reopen the road through the canyon, and  I saw smoke and a tree on fire. Yup, found where the lightening had struck!

When we got into the valley, we had a few stops to make: Costco, Sam's Club, IFA, and Bill Harris Music. We had done the food shopping and Cambria and Curtis had gone in to the music store to trade guitars. Those of us sitting in the car were looking to the south and watching the clouds roiling above us. I got out to get a better look at them. Hannah said, 'Hey, that one looks like a tsunami!" I took some pictures as the clouds continued to move and change. They had very interesting shapes and colors. Almost looked like tornado weather,  that lovely greenish cast to the sky.

Then we went to IFA for chicken feed and while Curtis was in there, the storm hit with full fury. No working up to it, it was gangbusters from the get go. He got a bit wet walking from the door to the car. We tried to make our way to the Lefebvre's but with the storm and the traffic for the BYU football game, it took us about 30 minutes, with a few detours. We saw trees down, signs blown over, rivers running down streets, cars trying to be boats......It was crazy and it was as close as I ever want to come to experiencing a hurricane.

Good Things: 

The farewell was great, it was nice to see all the family and friends...

watching people turn out to help each other (many in the Lefebvre's neighborhood had their basements flooded.) 

Nice to see Ford again and meet his girlfriend. 

Great weekend!

I liked the greenish tint between the banks of clouds in this one.

Interesting formations-moving fast

The really dark bottomed cloud is the one Hannah thought looked like a tsunami wave...

Here it is moving closer to us....

It really does look like it's just going to roll over us...

Heading east on 3rd S. Wipers could hardly keep up.

3rd S and University. Looks like fog, but it's just heavy rain.

Turning up the road to the Lefebvre's. The water pouring down the street was muddy and had rocks in it and was flowing out and over 8th N in Orem. See how deep it is on the wheels of the car in front of us...

See it running down both sides of the street. (darn orange paper.)

That little car across the street is Allyson's. It was actually lifted up by the debris caught under it. See the 'water fountain" directly below it in the picture. That was caused by the fast moving water hitting the slope of the sidewalk/driveway. You can also see the diverted water running across the graveled parking and sidewalk of the neighbor's house. Compare it to the picture below.

After the rain stopped, the kids all went out and started helping clean up. Here Hannah (in black) and Isabell are clearing rocks from the road.

They had quite a bit of work to keep them busy.