CHEERFUL-One Little Word 2015

As I wrote earlier, I chose Cheerful as my 'one little word' for 2015. I decided I needed a visual to remind every day of my goal. 

I found a quote based on Proverbs 15:13 that I really liked. So I printed it out in my new kitchen colors, added the smiley face bead, and it sits in my kitchen window where I will see it multiple times a day. Here's to a more cheerful 2015 :)

Drill Team 2014-2015

This was Hannah's second year on the drill team and second competition season. After taking 2nd at state drill last year, the team lost a lot of graduating seniors and a lot of incoming seniors who chose not to participate this year, as well as gaining a large group of incoming freshmen who were new to the whole cheer/drill thing. So it was basically a rebuilding year for the team.

I saw great improvements in Hannah's cheering, stunting and dancing abilities. She was much more relaxed and confidant and actually smiled a lot and didn't have that deer-in-the-headlights look she wore a lot last year. 

The drill competition season started with the meet at UVU in Dec. I rode up with 3 other moms and spent the entire day submersed in loud music and girls in skimpy costumes and too much make-up. I ended up with a huge headache but I did enjoy watching our girls perform and realized that, in comparison to the other teams I saw, our girls were very modest and well-behaved. It was apparent that most of the girls there have been dancing since they were children and had tons of experience. I was pleased with our team's efforts and they did very well.

Then it was on to region at Richfield. And that was followed by state competition which was again at UVU. They knew going in that they were up against very tough competition and that because their most experienced dancer was sidelined with a broken foot,  it would be hard to win. They did their best and came home with a 3rd place trophy. 

Cheer and drill team consumes a ton of time and energy. By the time drill competition is over and they finish cheer at state basketball, we are all ready for the break from the near constant practicing. 

I am thankful Hannah has had this opportunity to participate and learn new skills. I hope it has been a good experience for her.

military dance uniforms

at the competition preview they did before heading to state

on the bus heading to state - the drill moms do a great job of making them feel loved and supported

watching the state competition on live streaming 

At Snow College's event center for competition

'dance' uniforms

'character' uniforms - they danced to 'What About Breakfast at Tiffany's?'

Prom 2015

Cambria did not want to go to Prom this year. She felt that two years of it was enough.

So when this invitation showed up at our house, she was a bit dramatic about it. After much weeping, wailing and gnashing of teeth, she decided to accept the invitation and began thinking up a proper response. After a few days, maybe a week or more, and daily 'Are you EVER going to answer my brother?' questions from his little brother, she finally answered him. 

She and her dad shopped online for an affordable prom dress, which shipped by slow boat from China but made it in time for Prom. Whew! (Actually Curtis picked the dress she ended up with and it was really lovely on her.) 

They had dinner early and then everyone went home to gussy up before going to the dance. The next day they went to Moab for further adventures, such as a movie.

Prom this year had a Hollywood theme. So the official prom picture is supposed to look like they're on the red carpet at a Hollywood event. 

After all the drama, she came home saying it was the funnest prom she's been to. I'm glad she went.

Cute invitation. It came while she was at YW. We thought about eating it so she wouldn't know who it was from but decided that was too mean ;)

Trying on the dress...better get some heels!

She hated this sleeve detail and removed it pronto! It was kind of cheesy looking...

The lovely Cambria Welch escorted by the dashing Eli Johnson...

Spoken to through music....

In the last 18 months or so I have come to the realization that Heavenly Father often uses music to speak to me, to answer prayers and to comfort me. I wanted to record a few examples that have occurred in that time frame. 

~In August of 2013, I was released from my YW calling. I knew it was coming, I'd been in there for 3 years, so it was time. When I went into my appt with the bishop for a new calling he mentioned that he had a lot of changes to make. I figured I would get a Pirmary calling, maybe to team teach with my mom, or into the presidency as they had been in as long as I had been in YW. I never expected to hear the words that next came out of the Bishop's mouth! 
He looked at me and said he was extending a call to me to be the choir director for the ward. I sat there, dumbfounded. I'm sure my mouth was open. When he asked me if I could accept that call I struggled to find my voice and then said, 'But, Bishop, I don't know anything about leading music.' He asked me if I played the piano, and I told him I did but only for myself, that I couldn't play when people sing and I wasn't every good at all. He told me that he knew I could figure this out and do it. He again asked if I would accept the call and I tearfully told him I would try. I have never felt so inadequate for a calling before. Of course, they haven't called me to play the piano or organ and that would be even worse. 

Over the next few weeks, I cried every week in Church. I could feel the Bishop's eyes on me,(cause we sit in the front) and at one point he even gave a lesson in RS about accepting and magnifying our callings. I know it was directed to me. I didn't start practices right away, true to my energy type, I needed to do some research and see if I could teach myself to lead music before holding a practice. After about a month, with inquiries from the bishop and the pianist, I was starting to feel the pressure to get going with practice, I had no idea what to sing and to make matters worse, we were asked to provide the music for the upcoming stake conference. Oh, my stomach!!!

As I thumbed through the hymnbook and pondered different songs throughout my days, one line from one song kept coming into my head. I didn't even know the name of the song at first, although it was a familiar tune and I liked it. As it kept coming to me, I started to pay attention to it and realized that it was a Tabernacle Choir version that was running through my head. I decided that it would be very appropriate for our first song as well as to sing in Stake Conference. The song was Praise To The Lord, The Almighty. As we began practicing the song, (so thankful for the faithful people who support the choir and diligently come sing and put up with my poor music-leading skills!) I realized that the line of the song that had been running through my head was not only a clue about what song to sing, but was the Lord's words of comfort to me. The line was "ponder anew, what the Almighty can do, who with His love doth befriend thee".

He knew how I was struggling to accept and do this calling, how inadequate I felt and how scared I was and he was telling me to rely on him. What could not be done with the love and help of The Lord? I knew then that I would be able to get through this calling with his help and hopefully learn some new skills in the process. That was really so comforting to me and I loved hearing the choir share that message in Stake Conference, which happened to be my music-leading debut! It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be because when I stood to lead I could only see the faces of my ward choir friends and with their help and the Lord's I got through that and am still learning and growing in this calling. 

He has helped me with music a couple of other times, most recently our Easter song. Often he will put a tune or line of music into my head and when I really notice it's constancy I know its one we need to sing in Choir. I have enjoyed finding songs or arrangements that are not the standard or as well known. That part of the calling has been very fun for me. And I appreciate his little clues to them.

~The next significant time that The Lord used music to help me was in January. I had been working at the school, helping do bathroom cleaning because of medical issues of one of the regular workers, and at that time I was really in the doldrums about my life. I was feeling like I'd lost myself somewhere over the years and wondering if my life would ever be more than just being a mom, or cleaning up after everyone. Satan had really been doing a number on me, making me question my life's choices. 

One morning as I was mopping a floor and as I was listening to "Music with a Message' on the Mormon Channel, I heard a song that just stopped me in my tracks. It is by Jenny Jordan Frogley, (whose music I love) but I had never heard it before. It is titled In The Meantime. It was truly an answer to my searching, seeking soul that day and it has brought me much comfort and helped me find joy in my chosen path again. Here are the words:

In her heart she holds the dreams,
That she's carried since the day she turned thirteen.
Of all that she would be when she was grown,
Of all that she would do when she was finally on her own.
She dreams she flies,
She's still waiting for the chance to try...

But in the meantime she's a mother and a daughter and a wife.
Doing all she can to stay above the daily grind.
And she wonders when she'll ever have more meaning in her life,
She doesn't know she's being molded and refined,
In the meantime.

Someday she'll go back to school.
When the car pools and the soccer games are through.
Cause deep inside she's still the girl,
Who's always felt the fight to make a difference in the world.
She dreams she'll soar,
When she finally has the time to do more...

But in the meantime she's a sister and a teacher and a friend.
Hours turn into days, that turn to years that never end.
And she wonders when she'll ever really find herself again,
She's becoming one on whom God can depend,
In the meantime.

Heaven feels the joy of every victory in her life,
and heaven hears her heart before she cries.
Somewhere in the middle of the triumphs and the trials,
She's becoming sanctified.

In the meantime she's an answer and a blessing and a gift,
to every empty, aching heart that only she can lift.
Still she wonders if she'll ever get to see where heaven is,
If she could only see the mansion waiting there.
If she could only feel how much her father cares.
She would know she's being perfectly prepared,
In the meantime.    Jenny Jordan Frogley

I tearfully listened as I worked and I hoped and prayed it was true. That as I sacrificed to be a wife and mother, I was being molded and refined, one on whom God could depend, sanctified and perfectly prepared. I felt the truth of those words burn into my heart and in that moment I could let go of the pain and sadness I had been letting take over my heart. I've always known that God could and was making more of my life than I could make of it, this song just reaffirmed it to me in a morment of weakness and sadness. 

How thankful I am for music, for those who have a way of putting principles and truths into words and set them to music so that they can speak to my soul when it needs comforting. We have so much good music to listen to that teaches truth and brings the spirit into our lives and homes. What a blessing and resource our loving Father has provided for his children.

The tender mercies and answered prayers

I have always been thankful to have have my prayers answered and know that Heavenly Father is aware of me and my needs. Lately, however, I have noticed that not only are they answered but they are answered in very specific to me ways. Ways that I can really see that he knows and LOVES me, because they are such personal answers.

Here are a few recent examples:
1- Lately I've been feeling very unsettled, frustrated and just a general feeling of discontent with my life. I was beginning to wonder where Kassie had disappeared to. Wondering if my life would ever be more than just my role as a mom. I felt I had lost myself somewhere along the way. I had lost my creativity and desire to create. I don't think that it was confined to just me, it seems that I read of similar feelings on blogs of women I respect and also among some of my friends. Not sure why these feelings were so strong but I know they were really causing me to question why I am doing what I'm doing. I definitely was suffering from "martyr syndrome" and feeling quite picked upon and unhappy. In my head, I knew it was not warranted, I love my family and I know logically that being a mother is the greatest thing I can be doing, but at that time I just didn't FEEL it. I struggled with how to overcome these feelings and to once again find the joy in motherhood I have felt before and longed to feel again. I know that Heavenly Father knew my struggles and desires to feel at peace and happy with my choice to be a mother. He gave me that through the words of other mothers. I found a couple of blogs that I had never read before and each of these ladies shared words that really touched my heart and soul.
The first one was Karen who writes at ahousefullofsunshine.com. I found her blog through another blog about organizing, but it was her posts about mothers and her ebook, Your Beautiful Life, that really spoke to me. Here is an excerpt from her book that I really related to….

Fast-forward a few years, and I had three kids three years old and younger. I was exhausted, sleep-deprived, stressed out, and cranky. I flew from one crisis to the next all day long – breaking up fights, feeding a crying baby, cleaning up spills, tending to injuries, wiping noses, changing nappies, and answering the nonstop flow of wails and demands from my kids to open this or fix that or help them with something else. My life felt like a handmade boat, sinking not far from the shore. New leaks were springing up all over the place, and my whole existence revolved around scrambling from one leak to the next, frantically patching holes. I was in reaction mode. Survival mode. And yet, a part of me wondered – shouldn’t my life as a Mum be about more than just trying not to sink? Aren’t boats supposed to take us somewhere? ….

That’s what this book is about. Where are you going? Are you living the creative, joyful life you’ve always wanted to live? Do you have a destination in mind for your home, your family, and yourself? Or are you so busy patching holes and trying not to sink that you’ve forgotten where you’re even headed? 

But let’s be honest: when your life is consumed with your children on a daily basis, it’s easy to let an essential part of yourself slip between your fingers and disappear. 

I think of this as the GAP in your life when you become a mother. GAP stands for: 

Gifts 

Abilities 

Passions 

Some of you knew what your gifts, abilities and passions were before you become a mother, but now you feel like there’s nothing left of yourself to give to those areas. You’ve begun to forget about an essential part of who you are. 

Perhaps others of you have never taken the time to identify your giftings. 

When we suppress our creativity because we are too busy or tired or everything else seems more important, we anaesthetise a part of ourselves. 

I remember sitting on the love seat, in the addition, in the sunshine reading this ebook and having tears streaming down my face because it was so spot on for where I was at that moment. I truly believe Heavenly Father helped me find that blog when I most needed to read those words. 

Here is another quote from Karen that I love, from this post,

"Mama, I wish society could see what I see when I look at you. I wish your role was valued and honoured and respected. I wish you weren’t invisible. 

But for now, for those days when you feel unseen and unappreciated, remember the essential beauty and purpose in the hidden things.

You’re invisible the way warmth rests upon the skin; the way laughter need not be seen to find its way into the chinks and crannies of your soul. 

You’re invisible like a song in the dark. Like a kiss on a sleeping cheek. 

Like faith, and hope, and love.

Like the quiet beat of a heart, its repetitive work largely unnoticed, but without which none of us could exist." (I really loved this analogy!)

2-Another blog, entitled Mothers Who Know,  I came across on a Pinterest search for Scripture Study ideas and tips. It is written by Susan, who is the same age as me and has 8 daughters. She recently had a medical scare and as I read her experience it brought back memories of my own medical scare and I knew I needed to read her whole blog. It took me a few weeks of back-reading to read it all, but it is an amazing blog full of wisdom and truth. There are many posts on it that I will refer back to as needed, or direct others to when appropriate. 
Here is an excerpt from a post I really needed to read:

"Try as we might, we cannot separate ourselves from our divine, sacred role of mothers.  We are mothers.   Always.  Everyday.  No Matter What.  We set the tone for our families and lead our families according to our examples.  The family follows our lead, both the spoken and unspoken. This is NOT the time to  sow our wild un-sown oats from our teenage-hood.  We are not teenagers living in motherly bodies.  It was time to give all that up a lo-o--ong time ago.  We Are Mothers.  And need to act like it.  

We need to stop this mentality that is from the adversary meant and devised only to weaken mothers and eventually destroy the family, that it is OUR turn for everything.  That is such a needy and selfish way of thinking. It upsets the balance of the family.  As we are going out having "our turn", who is doing our role in the home?  Well, the children and husband are. They are at home waiting for their wife and mother to be done doing "their thing".   This "having our turn"  doesn't even strengthen us, like it promises to do.  It just emotionally detaches us from our sacred role as mothers and wives.  

It is not our turn, it is the Savior's turn. Not ours. Everything we do and are, needs to be what He would do and what He is.  We take His place in the home.  We are the healers and the nurtures. Just as everything HE did was about the Father, everything we do needs to be about the Savior."

Reading this really helped me put everything back into proper perspective. I had allowed Satan to tell me I was unhappy in my role as a wife and mother and I was allowing myself to become emotionally detached.  This post brought back to me that I really needed to just focus on the basics and being the mom that the Lord needs me to be for this family. Amazingly as we focus less on ourselves we find more joy. We love those we serve.

3- At one point a couple of books I had read years ago and loved came back into my mind. I had borrowed one from Grandma Yorgason and one from the library and had no access to them now. Our little town library did not have them in circulation. So I did what any 21st century woman does, I looked on Amazon. I was so happy to find them available and I 'threw' them into my cart and quickly bought them. I waited anxiously for them to arrive so I could read them again. 

The titles are: Things I Wish I'd Known Sooner, (Personal Discoveries of a Mother of Twelve) and Celebration! Ten Principles of More Joyous Living. 

They are written by Geroldeen Ashland Edwards. They are funny, insightful and inspiring. I have loved rereading them and they have helped me begin to find the joy in mothering that I had lost. I know that the thought of them popping into my mind was not of my doing. I hadn't thought of them in years. But Heavenly Father knew I needed to reread them and glean from them things that could help me in my current funk.

4-This year as I was trying to pick my one word for the year I had several I was contemplating. It is a year long resolution of sorts, a focus for the year. I pondered what i wanted to focus on this year and narrowed it down to Cheerful and Stickety-tuity. I guess I'm having a 2 word year this year. 

As I go about life I keep coming across the word cheerful and I have been surprised how many times I've found it in church quotes. This year we are studying Ezra Taft Benson in Relief Society. These two quotes were in lesson #4 and really caught my attention as I had just chosen Cheerful as my word.

We have no cause to really worry. Live the gospel, keep the commandments. Attend to your prayers night and morning in your home. Maintain the standards of the Church. Try and live calmly and cheerfully. … Happiness must be earned from day to day. But it is worth the effort.

Be cheerful in all that you do. Live joyfully. Live happily. Live enthusiastically, knowing that God does not dwell in gloom and melancholy, but in light and love.

I have also run across Doctrine and Covenants 64:33-34 a lot lately. I think it will be my scripture of the year. I plan to print it up nicely and frame it for my kitchen window. I  should probably try to memorize it as well. 

He has also answered my prayers through music over the years but I am going to write a whole post about that. How thankful I am that he hears me and answers my prayers, both spoken and unspoken. I love that he uses all forms of communication to answer me. I have learned that he can use whatever he desires to answer prayer and will use whatever method He knows will work. I am thankful for other women who share their hearts and wisdom and knowledge to inspire and help others. Perhaps someday, something I have shared will bless the life of someone searching for inspiration. Maybe it will be my daughter or granddaughter or even a great-great-great granddaughter. Heavenly Father often uses others to bless His children. I have been blessed by others who are acting as His hands and hope to someday be His hands in blessing someone else's life.

Thru The Month - March

Random events and pictures from March:

James continues the tradition of Welch kids falling asleep in strange places...

 Preschool math...each muffin cup held 1 item, so he had about 12 treats.

Kami enjoys her chili...such a cute girlie!

 Charlie turns 6! 

 playing at Deer Creek Res before heading to Idaho

 taking over the pool at our hotel in Idaho Falls

 having a fun evening at Montana's clubhouse in Rexburg

 stopping at the Snake River on our way home from Rexburg

What a cool river!

 Stopped at Fashion Place Mall to see the huge Lego exhibition.

(This could have been our last photo with Soren...we lost him in the mall. )

 Spent a day at the Aquarium....the only request the boys had about our Spring Break Trip itinerary

 Spent almost more time in the gift shop than in the rest of the aquarium.

 More beautiful skies

 Doing some rock-skipping at Loyd's Lake

 The continued kitchen project - we now have a wide-open pantry cupboard

 We celebrate Kami's 1st birthday. We were happy her Grandma Kandi was able to come down for it.

 But I think we wore Kami out. She fell asleep almost immediately after I took this picture of Curtis holding her.

 Sadie loves selfies (using Photo Booth) and she often has Kami join her!

L

Prom happened. A RED CARPET event in Monticello.

 Easter is coming! This year since Easter was the same weekend as Conference we had our Easter Seder on Monday for FHE so it could be it's own special time. We love it and look forward to it and didn't want to squish it between sessions.