HMMmmmm......

Well, on top of all the other changes this one is not so important but it is interesting. I have been trying to live as a Type 2 (DYT lingo) for the last 9 or so months. I have enjoyed it and been happy doing so. But a chance comment from a person on the T2 Facebook page has made me have some questions. She mentioned that I look very T1 to her, possibly even T4. The avatar that I had on fb at the time was 10 years old so I decided to take some new pictures and post them. I did so on a day that I was dressed T2 with wavy hair and grayish clothing. I posted them on my fb group and hoped that someone could see the 'blended' look to my face in spite of the turned up nose and 'apply' cheeks'. Everyone who commented mentioned something besides T2, mostly T1. Here is that picture. I look old and tired. ( I am, mostly)Someone then asked me to take and post a picture of myself in something more T1, just for comparison's sake. So I went to my closet and dug out a bright pink cardigan I kept and threw it on over the brown shirt I was wearing that day. Took the picture, posted it and you know what? Even I could see it. I looked more alive in the brighter color. One lady said I looked 10 years younger and I had to agree. Check it out below.

So now I'm unsure again what my dominant Type is. Maybe I am a T1 with a strong secondary 2 instead of the 2/1 I thought I was. I'm heading to Draper in a couple of weeks to get an energy draping done. I just want to know for sure. It has caused me to do a lot of reflecting and thinking about why I would choose to live in my secondary if that is truely what my T2 is. It's quite an interesting journey. I'll let you know how it turns out!

Last quarter of 2011

I just can't seem to keep up with my own life. The last couple of months have brought lots of changes to our family and I'm still trying to come to terms with it all. Just a quick recap. I'm hoping to write individual posts about these things, but if I don't at least I've documented it here. Nov.-Elder Welch #2 (Montana) heads off for the MTC and then to Toronto Canada where he will serve for the next 2 years. He is in an English speaking mission, so only spent 3 weeks at the MTC. Had a wonderful experience going to the temple for his first time. Then he and I and James went with Grandma and Grandpa to Provo to drop him off. Jordan was able to come down to Provo to see him before he entered the MTC. It was a nice time. Had a lovely Thanksgiving at our house with Grandma and Grandpa and Karla's family. Wendy's family had to go north to support their Crane family during a very difficult time. Curtis's grandmother passed away on Nov. 29 at the age of 101 11/12. Missed her 102 birthday by 21 days. She was such an amazing person and we were all so happy for her to be released from this mortal experience. We went to Provo area for her funeral on Sat 12/3. Sunday morning 12/4 as we were getting in the car to head to church we got a phone call from my mother telling me that my dad had passed away that morning. It was a phone call I was totally unprepared for and not expecting. We hurriedly threw our things in the car and headed home to be with Mom. We spent the next few days preparing for a funeral. I was so amazed at the love and support shown to our family at this time. This town and county we live in is amazing that way. So many people came to pay their respects for and share their memories of my dad. It's been 3 1/2 weeks and I miss him so much. I keep thinking he'll show up on my doorstep, knocking instead of walking in. He always did that even though we're living in his house. At certain times of day I seem to think of him the most. When it's quiet and I'm getting ready for the day or for bed. Often seeing something or hearing something will trigger it all again. I am so sad that my littlest kids won't remember or know him well. I'm sad that I can't see him or talk to him. But, I'm SO THANKFUL to know that this is not the end. He lives on and if I choose to live worthily, I WILL see him again. That truly brings me so much peace. I am also thankful that his aching joints are not troubling him anymore. They were really getting to be painful for him. In fact, I believe that it was a blood clot from the knee surgery he had on Monday prior to his death that caused his death. We are thankful it was quick and hopefully relatively painless. We had a nice Christmas and are staring the New Year in the eye. I'm hoping that we don't have another year like this one has been. Hoping for continued good health for my mom with no more cancer. Hoping for a good experience for both of the boys who have left our home. Hoping for peace and joy here at home with the time and ability to do some of the things that we feel are important. But if not......with the help of the Lord we can do all things. I have faith in his ability to see us through all things.

Modesty

This post has been in the back of my mind for over a year. You'd think I'd have found time to write about it before now, but better late than never I guess. I'll go back to the beginning of the thoughts I've had on this subject.

My daughter was given a CD of music for LDS Young Women in 2010. The music was written by Jenny Phillips. I found that I loved the music almost more than my girls. (I'm not a poet and don't love poetry, but I do love poetry set to music. It truly speaks to my soul.) I found myself listening to this CD often as I worked around the house or drove in my car.

One song really stood out to me and I just love the beautiful message it shares. Here are the lyrics.

Virtue
Because I love the Father
I want the minds of men to be lifted when
They look at me.
Because I am His daughter
I want my devotion to Him
To be what they see
I don't need the attention of immodesty
I am confident in my divinity.

Chorus: I didn't come to earth to compromise
I came here to hold up my light
No matter what the world may do
I'm a daughter of God, and
I'm holding on to virtue

I want to lead a life that
Is full of so much good
It attracts the light to me
So I'm trusting in my Father
To magnify the beauty
he has placed in me
I am confident in my divinity.

I live in a place with lots of beautiful, amazing women who are wonderful people but I wonder sometimes if they realize how they've been misled by the society we live in.There is so much emphasis placed on the beauty of the physical body and showing it off. I have never lived in a place with so many people who run. I have also never lived in a place with so many 'moms' who are considered 'hot' by the high school boys in town. What message is being sent to the youth and everyone else? That you can be a wife and mother and still have the body of a 20 year old? That you should have lipo and implants to get that 'hot' body? That it's okay to wear skin tight clothing to show off that body and draw attention to your hard 'work'?
I believe that it encourages our young people to focus on things that are of little worth eternally and is damaging to all, women, men and youth. I imagine that the young girls are envious of them and threatened by them at the same time. They want to look like them because they see the attention it garners. But are they also seeing them as 'competition' for the boys' attention? And it's just not right to flaunt it in front of young (or old)men who have a hard enough time controlling their thoughts.

I think our Stake Presidency(LDS Church leadership in a geographical area) and the Stake Relief Society(LDS womens' organization) Presidency must have had some similar thoughts and misgivings about what is going on. They held a special meeting for all RS sisters in our stake and essentially gave us a 'Standards Night', focusing on the topic of modesty. I was thrilled to see the topic addressed but disheartened at the turnout. It was basically preaching to the choir, those who needed to hear it weren't there. Regardless of that fact I was so thankful for a reminder that we as adults are just as accountable as our youth for upholding the standards the Lord has set forth.

I hope as I continue to raise my sons and daughters that I will be able to teach them to be modest and to not seek for attention with their bodies. Instead, to be a light of Christ to those around them and draw attention to themselves in a Christlike way.

I didn't come here to compromise but to hold up my light. I'm learning to be confident in my divinity and I'm thankful for reminders in music and word that this is something to strive for.

*disclaimer-I am not saying it's wrong to run or exercise or try to dress beautifully. Exercise is important for physical health. Dressing nicely is important as well, but it can be done modestly.

DYT update

So the promised pictures will have to wait. I can't seem to find my camera which has my memory card full of pictures in it. I really wish I could find it, or at least my mind. Maybe then I could remember where I'd put the blasted thing. LOL

It has been a crazy summer. I was really hoping to go to SLC to attend an intro night or a club night at the DYT center, but that never happened.

I was able to go up in August and had every intention in the world of stopping by the center in Draper to look at jewelry and accessories. But again, it didn't happen. It was too hot, the vehicle I was driving had no a/c and I had the baby with me, so I decided it was not the right time for me to shop. On that trip I did make it to a DI and can I just tell you what a different experience it was for me? I took my style guide with me and I first pulled things off the rack if they were the right color. Then I looked at the fabrication and design lines and if they were Type 2 AND close to my size then I put them in my cart to try on. I went to the dressing room with probably 30 items in my cart. That has never happened before. EVER! I ended up with about 5 shirts and a pair of jeans for $29. Then I found a cute gray T with soft, vintage embellishments in pinks and purples at Sams Club for another $7. I was so happy to have some new items to wear. Still wishing for a scarf or two or some jewelry. One of these days.

I think that day will be here soon. Someone kind ;) (you know who you are) used my DYT link and purchased a book and online course, and I received a commission for that. I'm so excited to have some store credit to use. I'm sure that true to my type, I'll debate and debate about how to spend it, but I am looking forward to putting some of those wonderful items in my virtual shopping cart and then getting a fun package in the mail.

I have not made as much progress with my hair redo as I would have liked. I had my hair-wiz sister cut it quite short in May because I was having the post-partum hair loss. I think though that that has mostly ended, so I'm in the growing it out a bit mode and it's in the icky in-between stage. You know the one. The one where you can't do a thing with it and just want it to grow fast or get it all chopped short again. I do need to visit my sis again and have her try to get my hair back to its natural ash blonde and maybe put some lighter ash highlights in it. Can't believe I'm saying that. For so many years I've tried desperately to add some brightness to my hair with golden and reddish tones. Typical Type 2 trying to be Type 1 thing to do. Haha.

I will take some new pictures and try to get them posted sooner rather than later. I'm anxious to share my very gradual transformation.

Dressing Your Truth

I have been in a fashion funk for a long time. Lot of things contributed to that. Too much weight from lots of babies, very little disposable income (gotta feed all those kids), and just not knowing what looked good on me or how to put things together. Last fall I was introduced (through the internet) to a program called Dressing Your Truth. I was intrigued and asked my family to give me the book about it for Christmas. I read it and thought I knew what my type was but wasn't sure. I watched some of the videos that are available to watch online and still wasn't sure. Then I listened to a conference call and true to my type was too reserved to ask any questions, although I had them. So I read the book again, with the things in mind from the call as I read, and things started jumping out at me. Why I do things the way I do them. I was able to pin down my type. FINALLY!! I saved up the funds to purchase the online course for my type and I've been attempting to 'live my truth' since then. Of course I can't do a complete overhaul in a month. I just don't have the funds, but I have been able to purchase a couple of things and it's so nice now to know what colors, lines and types of clothing to look for. I don't feel lost in the store anymore! And for me that's huge! I have always hated to shop cause there are too many choices. Now I can really zero in on what will look best on me. HOORAY!!!! I will make some changes to my hair and clothing. This is so EXCITING!! This experience it has been very liberating in many ways beyond the clothing/beauty part. 

Curve balls

Ever had a curve ball thrown at you? You're standing there in the batter's box, all settled into your stance and ready for that pitch. Then it's on its way and it looks like hundreds of pitches you've swung at before and you think,"Oh, easy hit." You begin to take a mighty swing and then you realize that it's moving away from your hit zone and you're not going to hit it. In fact, you're getting nothing but air with your swing, and starting to feel pretty foolish for swinging at all. Then it's past you and you're standing there looking for the ball you thought was a sure hit.



I'm not sure I've ever had a literal curve ball thrown at me, although I did play some softball in jr. high. I do feel like life has been sending a few figurative ones my way lately though.



Like the one last summer.



Just finished nursing child #8, really excited to be able to do more intense exercise and I was attempting to eat much differently than I had been doing. I was researching and reading about whole foods and really trying to eat natural, non-processed foods. I was even contemplating getting a goat for the raw milk. Then came the blahs. The upset tummy. The unending tiredness. I blamed it all on eating different foods. That must be it, right? Well, it took me almost a month to connect the dots and realize that perhaps it was more than the food I was eating. Enter a pregnancy test. With a big, fat, positive result.



Out the window went the exercise and good eating. In the window came naps and eating whatever tasted good and didn't give me heartburn.



Seems like every time I try to improve my health something comes along to stop me. Often it's been this particular curve ball. And it's not that I mind the result. I really love my kids. But I would also love some time to give some attention to my aging body and help it become healthier as I slide into middle age.



My latest curve ball has really thrown me for a loop. No way did I see it coming.



After 8 kids I figured I knew all there was to know about baking, birthing and feeding babies. I've nursed for well over 7 years of my life. No brainer. This baby #9 would be nursed, just like all the previous babies.



And he was nursed exclusively for 3 weeks. And he didn't gain any weight. He was just barely maintaining his weight. And he was starting to look bony and was very lethargic. But surely he was okay. He had wet and poopy diapers and he latched on fine.



The problem? He was not actively nursing or swallowing. Ever. He had been starving himself for 3 weeks and I didn't know it. What to do ? I borrowed a pump to see what was available for him and was shocked to see how diminished my supply was due to him not stimulating
production with his nursing. Enter formula and pumping. Maybe if he got stronger he would then nurse properly and I could stop pumping and supplementing.



Nope. He is the laziest eater I have ever had. Now at 8 wks since his birth, I have stopped pumping because the supply has run out. After 18 years of nursing I am now back to formula feeding my infant. I have gone through all the emotions, the guilt, the grief, the acceptance and excitement.


I so wanted to nurse him. I love nursing. I love being able to have that one-on-one time with my babies. I like an excuse to sit or lie down and read and have it be okay. I miss it very much.



However, I am thrilled that there are other options and I now have a 10 lb baby with chubby legs and double chin. I love that my other children get a chance to hold and feed him, bonding with their baby bro. I love that I have a bit more freedom, allowing me to keep up with the 2 year old and the 22 year old. I am excited to be able to get back to my exercising and eating better that was sidetracked a year ago.



Maybe this curve ball is to make up for the one thrown at me last year!

wait over!

Welch baby #9 finally made his appearance on Feb 28, 2011 at 6:44 a.m. He weighed in at 7 lb 4 oz., 20 inches.

Like all our multiple of 3 children, ie. #3 & #6, he has sparse hair on top and the rest of it is quite blond.

He is my smallest baby and I jokingly asked Curtis if he thought we were running out of baby making materials. It is interesting to hold him. He feels a little fragile to me and I keep him well wrapped up so that I feel like I am actually holding onto something. He also cannot keep his clothes on. Everything falls off his little shoulders.

Regardless, we are thrilled that he is finally here and that he is healthy. His jaundice is going away and we have a beautiful little pink baby boy to love on.

*pictures to come, if I can get my regular computer up and going.

Waiting Game

Wish I had some exciting news to share here, but we are playing the waiting game....

waiting for this new little boy to join our family.

waiting to see how my mom's chemo treatments are going. Is that *&^*&(^ tumor gone yet?

waiting for warm sunshine and blue skies.

While I've been waiting I've been a bit busy. I made a sidecar for my bed from a crib. I have a smaller bed now than I've had for 16 years and there was no way that 3 of us were going to sleep comfortably in that bed. Did some looking around on the internet and found out how to make an attached sleeping place for a baby. Thanks to a nice neighbor it cost me nothing.

I also took an adorable baby blanket someone had made me and added some more flannel to it to make it a bit bigger and it is now my new car-seat tent. Love that it is tied to the handle of my car seat making the handle useable.

Made myself a new nursing cover. I've never had one before, just used whatever old blanket I could find that wouldn't suffocate the baby. I actually made one out of a cute print with boning to make a place for me to see him and for him to breathe.

Also finished up the little boys curtains today. Just need to wash, iron and hang them.

Think I'm nesting yet?????